WRETCHED

 watch me accept it quietly

with fingers locked behind my back 

tongue safe between my teeth

watch me be good and brave and understanding

the neighborhood went dark

this loss deserves more than a black dress, don't you think?

I coated the street with slices of shattered bulbs

and i take your new freedom hostage without asking for a ransom

watch me forget how to break gracefully

a veil of barbed wire protects onlookers

from the face of  this morning.

as i lead a funeral procession

through your cold bedroom

cauterize the wound with an apology

while you wipe off your hands

declare the time of death

rip it out of my arms

pacify me with vinegar

look me in the eyes

while you claim it was fate that drove you to it

And half of me is into the brown blossom with you so much of me is because you died.

just dont deny me this sorrow

I will grieve on the rooftops

open- mouthed and ugly

until the sky has to close its eyes

until the thunderclouds cover their ears

until my own sobs call me wretched